Baggage Claim

“Finding Joy Between the Casseroles and Chaos” Thanksgiving episode

• Greg and Jess • Season 1 • Episode 37

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The holidays can be loud: budgets stretched, schedules stacked, emotions running hot. We wanted a quieter center, so we started with a playful tour of Thanksgiving—deviled eggs, green bean casserole, and the eternal stuffing versus dressing debate—and followed it straight into the heart of the season: how to choose gratitude when life feels heavy.

We open up about a tough morning where financial stress and work strain kicked off a spiral, and how a single question—“Tell me one thing you’re thankful for”—helped us find the floor again. From a grandbaby’s ruffle pajamas to the surprise of birdsong during a car repair, we trace the small anchors that shift perspective. Gratitude isn’t a slogan here; it’s a tool you can pick up in real relationships. We talk about contentment without complacency, how a daily gratitude list can rewire your outlook, and why naming specific thanks to your partner—“Thanks for loading the dishwasher”—can change the tone of a home.

You’ll hear stories that feel familiar: the pressure to give, the sting of grief during gatherings, the mess of laundry that never quite gets folded. We don’t gloss over any of it. Instead, we map out simple practices you can try today: a 10‑day, five‑item gratitude list; a daily text naming two things you appreciate; letting your community reflect good back to you when you can’t see it yourself. Along the way we offer a book that shaped our thinking and invite you to borrow our habits while you build your own.

If the season feels like too much, you’re not alone. Press play for practical, real-world ways to steady your mindset, strengthen your relationships, and find joy in the smallest details. If this helped, tap follow, share it with a friend who needs a lift, and leave a quick review so more people can find the show.

SPEAKER_02:

Hey guys, what's up? I'm Greg. Hope you guys are ready to unpack and get into some good conversations tonight.

SPEAKER_05:

And I'm Jess, and this is our podcast on Baggage Claim. Thank you for joining us.

SPEAKER_02:

What's up, Baggage Claim? How's everybody doing today? I'm so excited that you guys have decided to join us. You know, if you if you're new to Baggage Claim, this is a place where we're hoping to create some conversations, community around marriage, blended families, relationships, all those fun things. If you're a natural here and you've been at baggage claim a while, just thank you, grab your favorite drink, whatever that is, pull up to the table with us. And uh grab your chair, pull up. If you're driving in the car, whatever you're doing, then you know, just in your mind, kind of pull up to the table with us and let's get into some fun conversation. This is for you guys who may not be watching it on video, this is our Thanksgiving edition. And so we have Thanksgiving crap everywhere.

SPEAKER_05:

Thanksgiving decorations. Uh Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving crap.

SPEAKER_03:

No, it's good decorations. Yeah, it's okay. I use that same term as well.

SPEAKER_05:

Our social media marketing director did a phenomenal job. I don't know what your title is. What is your title? Creative directory.

SPEAKER_03:

The Miranda Director.

SPEAKER_05:

The Miranda Director. The creative director.

SPEAKER_02:

So I got into a discussion on what the this horn with all this crap falling out of it. I thought it was called a horn, and I was told it was.

SPEAKER_03:

Nobody knows your head. Like if you it sounds like an eye disease. Huh? Sounds like an eye disease.

SPEAKER_05:

Or it's called a horn of plenty.

SPEAKER_03:

Horn of plenty.

SPEAKER_05:

Yeah, it has two names.

SPEAKER_02:

It was weird. So anyway, we're talking about Thanksgiving. This is a Thanksgiving episode, which is weird for us to say because we started in February, and I didn't know that we'd still be doing this Thanksgiving.

SPEAKER_03:

We were literally like, oh, we'll do like two episodes and see how it goes if we want to keep doing it.

SPEAKER_02:

And here we are.

SPEAKER_05:

What happens is we've added more countries.

SPEAKER_02:

38 episodes later. And uh yeah, we had enough. For you guys who uh for everyone's in Finland who listened to us this past week, yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

Thank you.

SPEAKER_02:

Uh you guys are awesome. I actually am watching an episode of a guy not an episode of Finnish guy like a little series thing. Yeah, a guy in Finland who bought an island and is building a log cabin. So, bro, if this is you, bro shut your mouth. Shut your mouth.

SPEAKER_05:

Yeah, message Greg because he will have a heart attack.

SPEAKER_02:

Yes, I absolutely love watching your uh you're building a really big house, bro.

SPEAKER_05:

Like I saw some of it. That house is big. It's really cool by your all by yourself.

SPEAKER_02:

Anyway, so let's jump into our fun uh Thanksgiving episode that we're having fun.

SPEAKER_05:

Thanksgiving's not always fun, though, for some friends.

SPEAKER_02:

I'm gonna have fun right now until we probably get into the conversation.

SPEAKER_05:

Okay, it's fun right now.

SPEAKER_02:

We're gonna have fun until we go.

SPEAKER_04:

Okay, having so much fun.

SPEAKER_02:

So you know what time it is?

SPEAKER_04:

Question time.

SPEAKER_02:

Who are you saying this time? I didn't, but it wasn't very well. Yeah, you did great. That's fine. So um I have a I do have a question, and it is around Thanksgiving. So Thanksgiving does bring about a weird emotions. It could be happy, it could be sad, it could be excitement.

SPEAKER_05:

Not necessarily weird, but a big range of emotions.

SPEAKER_02:

That's true. Thank you. Thank you for helping me choose my words wisely. Um I didn't choose my words wisely, but you helped correct.

SPEAKER_05:

Anyway, my question is I'm a teacher, that's what we do.

SPEAKER_02:

What is your favorite all-time go-to Thanksgiving food? What is the one thing at Thanksgiving that you would absolutely you just absolutely love? So I I'm I'm gonna say though, Thanksgiving. I love Thanksgiving.

SPEAKER_05:

You do.

SPEAKER_02:

I love Thanksgiving because there's no presents. There's uh it's just about the food and it's just about the the hanging out.

SPEAKER_05:

Just being together.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, just being together. There's no exchange of anything. We don't have to buy gifts, we don't have to do anything. We're just gonna be together and just eat some good food. So you guys got anything? What's your favorite food?

SPEAKER_05:

Um, well, before uh we lost Nanny, her dressing was my favorite.

SPEAKER_02:

Her dressing?

SPEAKER_05:

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_02:

Her dressing. Nanny always used to give me crap about how I would do the turkey. We do the turkey every year, and every year she would stand by my side and just give me a couple of things. I'll try to post a picture. I'll try to post a picture of the two of us and see. And she would give me crap every year. You shouldn't do that, Greg. You should do it like this. I was like, Nanny, you want to do this?

SPEAKER_05:

No, well, that's why you're here. She would say.

SPEAKER_01:

But we had such a blast.

SPEAKER_05:

I do love deviled eggs, though. That's another deviled eggs. What's the impressive?

SPEAKER_03:

You can't just pick like one food. It's more like what foods can't go, can you not go without? Like you have to have for Thanksgiving. You know what's weird is I don't love turkey.

SPEAKER_05:

No, you don't.

SPEAKER_03:

I do. I love turkey. I love turkey. It's too dry to me. No, give me that dark meat stuff.

SPEAKER_05:

I don't dry.

SPEAKER_03:

My dad always does the injection stuff too, so it's like crazy juicy. Well, I've tried that too.

SPEAKER_05:

Your stepdad likes to always deep fry one, and that's really good.

SPEAKER_03:

The smoked one is really good.

SPEAKER_05:

Smoked one's weird. It changes the flavor too.

SPEAKER_03:

If we take out like turkey, because I feel like turkey and ham should just be like a like that's part of Thanksgiving. Like that's just a no-brainer. Green bean casserole. That's such a southern thing.

SPEAKER_02:

Yes. If you're below the basic Dixie line, green bean casserole is everyone's and stuffing. Stuffing. Stuffing versus dressing.

SPEAKER_03:

But is it not the same? No, it's not. Bro, come on. So tell me, tell me what's the difference then? Because I've always done stuffing. I thought that was a good thing.

SPEAKER_00:

Our studio audience is stuffing is what is inside of the turkey. Dressing is what is made in the casserole.

SPEAKER_02:

It's like a plate, like it's in the pan.

SPEAKER_05:

It's got a mixture of like cornbread, love bread, like 7,000 seasonings.

SPEAKER_03:

So just how you cook it is the only difference? Yes.

SPEAKER_05:

Yeah, and Greg's mom.

SPEAKER_03:

Yeah, like within the turkey itself. Yeah, stuffing goes in the turkey.

SPEAKER_00:

Like corn and everything that you have on Thanksgiving cooked inside of the turkey.

SPEAKER_03:

Yeah. But then there's some families like See, we'll use the broth from the turkey itself to make the stuffing. Or technically, I guess dressing. I guess it's dressing. So what I'm referring to would actually technically the dressing. Yeah, it's in a panel.

SPEAKER_02:

And then you scoop it out with a spoon. Is it solid? Is it more so like stuffing is more fluffy, not as solid.

SPEAKER_05:

Like dressing is more like stove top stuffing that's kind of trying to replicate like stuffing from the inside of the bird.

SPEAKER_03:

No, we always but we use the instead of doing like chicken broth, we always get the oils from the bird and make it with that stuff. That's yeah, it's a typical dressing.

SPEAKER_05:

That's dressing. That you put in or dressing.

SPEAKER_03:

Dressing.

SPEAKER_02:

That's my favorite thing.

SPEAKER_05:

Thank goodness Greg's mom will make one dressing that's like normal and then the other one has normal celery in it.

SPEAKER_02:

It doesn't have celery in it. It's like why are you dressing? Why not use dressing? Why are you putting salad crap in here? No, uh salad.

SPEAKER_05:

It's just leave the celery doing that. I have a backup question.

SPEAKER_02:

Nobody wants celery at Thanksgiving. Thank you.

SPEAKER_05:

Or a follow-up.

SPEAKER_02:

I can tell you this. The guys who still over here were not just like, bruh, I would love to have some celery. No. I would love to have that.

SPEAKER_03:

Greg's got to answer first, though, because I want to hear your question, but Greg's got an answer because he didn't eat it. Mine was dressing.

SPEAKER_02:

Oh, dressing.

SPEAKER_03:

Can't go without dressing.

SPEAKER_02:

Dressing in ham, I'll eat my weight in Thanksgiving.

SPEAKER_05:

Make ourselves sick. Okay. Um, are you food touching on your plate or food not touching on your plate?

SPEAKER_02:

All mixed. Thanksgiving, it's all powerful. All mixed in. Because I like cranberry like that cranberries. Oh, yes. Even the stuff that comes in the can, they just cut it.

SPEAKER_05:

It has to be that.

SPEAKER_02:

And I know that I can put little ridges in the side of it. Cranberries earlier.

SPEAKER_03:

But Thanksgiving, I will eat a whole can of cranberries.

SPEAKER_01:

It's just so crazy.

SPEAKER_03:

I love it. I don't ever eat cranberries ever.

SPEAKER_05:

And I don't love it, but yeah, I grew up that it has to be the can. You have to slice it. I don't mind if my food touches. I don't want it to mix. Our oldest daughter, Callie, and she probably still is this way. I don't know. I'll have to ask her when we see her this weekend, but she used to want everything like so separated. Like she would have loved to have like a like a lunchroom tray.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, she loved it divine. She loved it divine.

SPEAKER_05:

So that nothing would touch. And she would eat one thing at a time around her plate. And I'm just like, I bounced around here and there and here and there. I do that.

SPEAKER_02:

Sometimes like I'll get focused on something and I'll eat that and then I'll turn the plate. You do not have to do that. You get her the other side plate. So probably just some of that for me.

SPEAKER_03:

But I will say though, like Thanksgiving is a great time to try things. Yeah. Right. So if I can add another food, sweet potato casserole. Oh God.

SPEAKER_02:

That is a must-have for Thanksgiving. Sweet potato casserole is pretty good.

SPEAKER_03:

Because I will say this like, try the different combinations, right? So like try a little bit of sweet potato casserole with the dressing.

SPEAKER_05:

I'm a texture girl.

SPEAKER_03:

Or then try some of the sweet potato casserole with the green bean casserole.

SPEAKER_05:

No.

SPEAKER_03:

Oh my goodness.

SPEAKER_05:

Casseroles get a little mushy for me. That's a little mushy territory.

SPEAKER_03:

Jess is not a mixer. Oh, I'm a mixer, man. She's not a mixer.

SPEAKER_02:

I'll try that sometimes, but I'm just like, see what happens.

SPEAKER_03:

Right? No, but hey, that's all I'm asking for. See what happens. If you like it, you like it. If you don't, don't do it again, you know?

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, it's true. Yeah. So, I mean, with all that being said, Thanksgiving, the idea is that it's a time where we get to give thanks. Uh, which is something that in normal day life, it's just life is so busy, so hectic, so crazy. We don't stop to actually think about what we're thankful for.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

And so, and so many times in life, Thanksgiving can be like overwhelming with preparing, getting ready with family.

SPEAKER_05:

Um well, especially if it's family that you aren't with often, that's awkward for some. I mean, our families, we all live in the same vicinity. So we we see each other often. Well, I say we all. I mean, we've got kids scattered here and there, but predominantly all of us live around here. It's we don't go months and months and months or a year without seeing our family members. So that's not awkward for us always, but there's some folks.

SPEAKER_02:

I mean, that's there's a lot of people out there who don't.

SPEAKER_05:

You see them on holidays and that's it. So that that's kind that can get kind of weird, I think.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, because it makes it weird because then you're like, okay, what are we talking about? What do we talk about? What do we don't talk about? What is off limits um when it comes to sitting around the table? Which is, I mean, we could do a whole episode on just uh which I suggested uh dealing with in-laws. Um how do you deal with in-laws? And um hopefully we tackle that hopefully we tackle that topic sometime soon over uh the holidays because you spend more time with in-laws probably during the holiday season than you do any other time. Um my hope is is that our in-laws, I say ours, but our son-in-laws and daughter-in-laws feel comfortable enough that they can be open and honest with us and just be real. So we try to create that, but that doesn't mean we always do. So but we're gonna talk, we're gonna try to focus on gratitude and what does gratitude look like? What does gratitude mean? Um you you don't happen to have your phone with you, do you?

SPEAKER_05:

No.

SPEAKER_02:

Ah, great. Uh, because we were talking about uh gratitude earlier, and we looked up some things about how uh gratitude is kind of like I want you to think about it as a like I we want to help give you a tool.

SPEAKER_05:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

Like I always say, hey, I do a lot of handyman projects right now. It's kind of my I don't know why, but that's where I'm at in life. And so it's my truck is full of tools. There's literally a um, there's a multi-tool, there's a chop saw, there's a paint sprayer, um, there is a there's wood hanging out the back of it. No, I took it out. There was a couple of ladders out of the bag. There was I mean. Yeah, I have uh I probably have eight boxes of screws. I have stuff for painting. There's so many tools in my truck.

SPEAKER_04:

Yes.

SPEAKER_02:

I could roll up and be like, oh yeah, let's get on this. And some of it's organized, some of it's not. Um gratitude, I want you to think about gratitude.

SPEAKER_05:

Meanwhile, there's a car seat in my truck, in my jeans. And a stroller. I have a car seat and a stroller. So but I want to stagger in my life.

SPEAKER_02:

I want you to think about gratitude as a as a tool.

SPEAKER_05:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

Like a hammer or a screwdriver or a drill. Um, that's how my mind works. So I know if you're not handy, you probably don't get that idea. But think of it as a tool that I can use. I'm not always gonna use it, but sometimes it's very helpful. Um, but gratitude is a tool that you can use in your relationships, whether it be husband, wife, uh, work relationships, uh, whatever relationship that you have. Um and so we're gonna kind of dig into that idea of gratitude. What does it look like? How does it work? How do you use it in your relationship? And uh what's the benefits of it? And what are the I don't know, what are the what what makes it hard? Why is it so hard for us to be grateful for what it is that we have?

SPEAKER_05:

Well, I mean, we could be start off with a very personal example.

SPEAKER_02:

Oh, we're going like hardcore, like real life situation right now, right off the get-go. I mean, why not? Yeah, let's start with that.

SPEAKER_05:

Yeah. This morning, I was feeling um very um stressed out. I was overwhelmed. I had was already at work.

SPEAKER_02:

Do you wanna do you wanna I mean if we're being honest? I'm sorry. I have something in my throat. So sorry for the clearing of my throat.

SPEAKER_01:

It's okay.

SPEAKER_02:

But if we're being honest, what were you like what were you s so anxious about or concerned about?

SPEAKER_05:

It's for you and I, it's a tough season financially right now. There's a lot going on. I think God is teaching us to be wish we could go ahead and learn the lesson.

SPEAKER_02:

Apparently, we really suck at learning lessons.

SPEAKER_05:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

But it's just teaching us to live in the moment.

SPEAKER_05:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

Like there's not a um there's not a lot of security.

SPEAKER_05:

Um we don't have a big game plan currently.

SPEAKER_02:

No, and that's okay because I I say it's okay. I'm maybe I'm trying to pep talk myself.

SPEAKER_05:

Well, it is okay because you've always been a good steward of what we do have, and I trust you in that and your leadership. But I just had a moment this morning, I was just like, my mind went nuts with making this whole big list of all these things that are happening that we need to do. And then obviously we're coming up on the holidays and all the things that I we want to buy and do and give, and just this the list just was multiplying. And I'm there's is I'm in a very stressful season at school with learning some new curriculum. It was just like pile and pile and pile and layer and layer and layer.

SPEAKER_02:

Do you think everybody, maybe not everybody, but a lot of people who are listening feel the exact same way?

SPEAKER_05:

Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

Because you're feeling the stress of the holidays coming up, and you're like, oh man, if money's tight, I gotta spend money, I gotta buy gifts, I gotta go places that's gonna cost me money. I gotta I gotta all these other things I gotta do, and money's already.

SPEAKER_05:

On top of just making ends meet, like just regular life is expensive.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05:

Even if you do it frugally like we do, it's just hard.

SPEAKER_02:

Because that stress, whether you say it or not, that stress translates into how you communicate, how you operate with your significant other or other relationships in your life. Yeah. So go ahead.

SPEAKER_05:

I was going about my morning before the littles got there, and I just texted you. I was like, I'm feeling very overwhelmed about this and this. Can you please help me? Help me like, I can't remember how I phrased it. Just please help me not to, or whatever I said. I was like, I need a lifeline.

SPEAKER_02:

I think it very much was, which is so interesting because you texted me, and today was kind of a unique opportunity for me in handyman stuff because my mom asked me if I would do some bush hogging around my grandparents. They still have their old farm. And so I spent the day, and if you're in Georgia today, the high was 48, I think. So it was cold.

SPEAKER_05:

So I spent if it got that high though, it was cold.

SPEAKER_02:

So I was on a tractor um bush hogging on old family farmland, not like hay, but just cleaning up and doing some things. And it was kind of a is a very interesting spot for me because that's a place where it helps me remember what it used to be like when I was a kid there when I'm there, and it's just it's so calming, but yet so peaceful for me just to be there.

SPEAKER_05:

So when you texted that, I was like, Well, you said uh tell me one thing you're thankful for. And I was like, Yeah, I did go straight to I don't know what it was, but I'm not thankful for anything right this very second.

SPEAKER_02:

I was like, okay, so if you're if you're stressed about money, you're stressed about these situations, tell me something you're thankful for.

SPEAKER_05:

It took me a few minutes.

SPEAKER_02:

It did. You I think you texted back. Uh it's really hard for me to see that right now.

SPEAKER_05:

Uh-huh, I didn't.

SPEAKER_02:

And just kind of uh and so then I was I didn't text back.

SPEAKER_05:

No.

SPEAKER_02:

And then you texted like three or four other things, and then finally you said Yeah.

SPEAKER_05:

Well, first I said, of course, I went straight to Lulu. Yes, our grandbaby. She's 15 months old now, and she is walking and starting to talk and put phrases together. And I said, I was remembering literally last night after bath time, she was walking around in her ruffle butt pajamas, and she just looked at it was me and you and Miranda, because Thomas was at the fire station, and she looked at us and she started waving and she said, Night night, bye-bye. And started walking towards the house. She was walking towards the door, she was like, I'm out, guys. And it was right at 7:30. It was her night-night time, and she was just telling us, okay, I gotta go. And so I was just saying how thankful I am that she's healthy and that she's learning so fast. And then I said, I'm thankful for you.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05:

I mean, those are just two easy things to say. I'm thankful for.

SPEAKER_02:

But I think too, like for me, it was when I think about, because it's so easy to see all the crap that we're in, because I don't care where you're at, in what stage of life if you're in, if you're in your 50s, 40s, 30s, even if you're in your 20s, you're you're probably you're probably neck deep in some kind of crap that's going on right now. Yeah. Uh there's a lot of people who are out there who are probably struggling because of the government shutdown when I know that they said, hey, snap, and there's no more money, and people were freaking out, going, How are we gonna feed our kids? Like that's a I get it, that's a real life scenario. Um there's there's there's stress everywhere. And it's easy for us sometimes to focus on those things, and we just get so bogged down on it that we forget to be grateful for the things that we do have. We always because life and social media and all the other things want to tell us all the things we should be going for and what we should have. Yeah, like you should be doing this. And I'm trust me, I'm as guilty as anybody about pushing myself for more. Not more stuff, like it's not more stuff, but more productivity, be more efficient, be better at this, be a better dad, be a better husband, be set unrealistic expectations on yourself. Yes, I 100% do. Yeah, uh, I feel like a Chevy Chase moment there when you say that, but it's so true. When have I ever learned that these are some unrealistic expectations? And so it's trying to reel that in, but I I I say this, I I don't want to use his last name, but there's this guy, John, I met two years ago. Man, he just got out of rehab and he had heard me speak somewhere, and he said, Greg, I don't have a sponsor. Would you be like a sponsor for me? Um and just hold me accountable for the things that are going on. And he's like, this was and so we sit down, we had, and he told me his situation, his story. I could pull up my phone right now, yeah, and for the last two years, every single day, this guy rides on a pad at least ten things and sends you a picture and takes a picture of it and sends it to me every single day of ten things he's grateful for. And man, every time I I and I do, I read John. I don't even know if you listen to this, I don't even know if you listen to podcasts or have ever, but that thing is it it one, it reminds me of where I've been. Yeah, it reminds me of of the idea of the things I do have that I am grateful for. Yeah. It's one of those most powerful things that if we just reached out and just sometimes just talk to our friends and said, Hey, I'm grateful for you for this. It's a powerful, powerful tool that we don't use. Um but I read this guy's things that he's grateful for, and it just helps me shift my perspective and go, okay, Greg, stop feeling sorry for yourself, quit kicking yourself. Okay, yeah, things aren't great. They're not where you want them to be, but bro, look what you do have. Like let's take them in and look what you do have.

SPEAKER_05:

Well, after we had talked about this is gonna be our subject tonight, and I was just kind of looking back because we like to look back at the last, you know, few episodes, handful of episodes. And of course I'm not gonna find it now because yep, there it is. I wrote down again, I have mentioned this book so many times. Um, that 1000 gifts by Anne Voskamp, because that was a book somebody gave me when I was um in my grief portion of my journey. And it truly did change my life and the way I looked at stuff. And I'm just sitting here thinking to myself, listening to you was like, I need to read that book again. I do. Because I need to be reminded.

SPEAKER_02:

I'll tell you this. I don't even know how much the book costs, but I'll tell you this. If you if you go to our social media and and you send us a message on social media, one of our socials, like all of our baggage claim socials, if you go to one of our socials and just say, Hey, I'd love to read the book.

SPEAKER_05:

Now a lot of her um the way she writes, the the language she uses is kind of fancy here and there. So you have to kind of look past that. But then there's other parts, it's just like so simple. It's just like yes, I can what's the name of the book again? One thousand gifts by Anne Boskamp.

unknown:

Okay.

SPEAKER_05:

But it's simple things like Did you hear that bird singing when you just went to get the mail? Thank you for that. Or the beautiful color of the trees right now, you know, thank you. Like just simple.

SPEAKER_02:

Well, I think if we the the problem with being grateful or having that that perspective is that we create these scenarios in our life where we're so stinking busy, yeah, we don't have time to stop. The the other day it was so weird. It's not weird, but it's it w it it may sound weird if you're listening to it. Anne Grace, one of our daughters, was trying to change the bulb in her headlights, and bless her heart. She gave it a good shot.

SPEAKER_05:

She tried so hard.

SPEAKER_02:

And so she came in and got me. She's like, I can't do this. I need your help. And I was like, okay.

SPEAKER_05:

Even before she started, she was like, Here's what I'm doing. Dad, I don't want you to come out here now, but let me go try first.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, which I I appreciate. And I used to do that with Thomas. Thomas would, our son would be like, he was trying to do something to his blazer, and I'll be like, ah, cool.

SPEAKER_04:

That sounds great.

SPEAKER_02:

I knew he was going to struggle. And I was like, I there's such growth opportunity in the struggle, though. So I didn't want to go out and do that for him.

SPEAKER_05:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

Uh now there are times where I would go out and help, but it's almost the idea of when you get to do that, you learn so much to this. So anyway, side story.

SPEAKER_05:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

So she's she she came out.

SPEAKER_05:

We were inside playing with Lucy because her parents were on a date that night. And so, yeah, then she calls it.

SPEAKER_02:

I go out and I'm out there fiddling with this light, and I swear I hear this bird that sounds like mocking Jay from undergate. Is this the mocking Jay? I swear this bird sounded just like it.

SPEAKER_05:

Running in the house.

SPEAKER_02:

It was like singing to us. And I was like, Erin, do you hear that? That's so because it was quiet.

SPEAKER_05:

Lucy and I were playing with our dollhouse, and we had to run outside to hear this bird that was.

SPEAKER_02:

And of course, when they came out, it didn't do it anymore. But uh we just stood there just looking around, like it was the but the the thing is, is like we're out putting this light in the car, and it was the most incredible, cool opportunity to just go, whoa, how beautiful. What kind of bird is that? We're in Georgia. What is that? It was really, really cool. But it's the opportunity we don't create opportunities for us to slow down and to take a breath.

SPEAKER_05:

It's a mindset thing. It really is. Just a gratitude mindset.

SPEAKER_02:

So, how do we get to that going into Thanksgiving? Because Thanksgiving, we do this thing out. I'll say this family can be easy. Family can be the the most amazing thing in the world and can also be the most hurtful, detrimental thing in the world. Because there's a lot of people who may be listening to this um all over the world, which is nuts to say that. But um wherever you're at, when this time of year rolls around, it's not happy, it's not exciting, it's hard, it's tough. Um, and maybe family, maybe because you've lost a loved one and you reflect on that. I want to ask you to shift that a little bit and go think about what you do have right now. Not what you lost, but what you do have. Like what's in your what's in your grip right now that you can look at and be thankful for. Um so I know family can be tough. And we do this thing in my family sometimes, my big family, which is like a gazillion people sitting around the table.

SPEAKER_05:

Your cousins keep having kids well into their 40s in their world.

SPEAKER_02:

I don't know what they're trying to do. But it's a uh tell us one thing you're thankful for. Uh and we all go around the table, and it just, you know, sometimes it's cheesy. Um, but in life, uh I mean, sometimes it's good just to look at your spouse and go, I'm thankful for this. Like Jess takes to me the other morning and said, I left really, really early, like before she did. I left at like 5 45 and she was leaving. She goes, I put the dogs up and I loaded the dish for the house.

SPEAKER_05:

I was so proud of myself.

SPEAKER_02:

And I was like, I'm actually very thankful for you. Thank you for doing that.

SPEAKER_05:

Well, because another different day when you left early before me, I forgot to put the dogs up and then they pee pee'd in the house. So I was so excited. I was like, I put them up.

unknown:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

But I think sometimes the simple, like one of those simple things in your relationships, if you really want to like next level your relationship, yeah. Like if you really want to use this, this is a tool that can really make a huge difference in your relationship, is just sometimes look at them and tell them what you're grateful for. Like I'm I am I'm thankful for this. I am thankful that you even when they do something that may be silly, like thank you for making my coffee, or thank you for making breakfast, or thank you for putting my clothes away, or or even washing my clothes, or thank you for cooking dinner. I don't, there's so many different things you can be thankful for. Um, but we bypass all those and we're like, why'd you leave your socks on the floor? Why did you do this?

SPEAKER_05:

Thank you for being patient with me when I don't fold clothes for six weeks at a time. And they're clean, but you don't thank you for not getting frustrated with me.

SPEAKER_02:

So those people who are out there who wash your laundry and put it away.

SPEAKER_05:

I need you to call me.

SPEAKER_02:

Dude, you were you you're I'm telling you, you're you're our goal. That's our goal. That's another level of being a person.

SPEAKER_05:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

We should start some seminars and take over the world.

SPEAKER_05:

I don't understand that.

SPEAKER_02:

It's just it's just insane, bro. We could we can wash clothes, but we can fall off the cliff when it comes off and taking them out of the water. Dryer, they don't know.

SPEAKER_05:

Everything is clean.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, just we can't we can't get to the fin. We're a great beginning and middle, it's the end that we just can't. I can't.

SPEAKER_05:

I cannot. The last time we folded clothes, this is embarrassing to say. I calculated that they have been sitting there, the clean clothes have been sitting there for two months.

SPEAKER_02:

I found a bathing suit.

SPEAKER_05:

Yep. It's fall.

SPEAKER_02:

I found a bathing suit where we folded. I was like, bro, what's the last time I had the why do I why do I have a bathing suit that looked different?

SPEAKER_05:

I found a laundry at work t-shirt that I worn to school, and I knew when I wore it, because we had taken a team picture and it was the first week of school. And then it and that was August, and then it was October when we were phoning the clothes for the city. So that's really that's our life.

SPEAKER_02:

Now we could be mad about that, we could be frustrated about it, but the fact is we put some music on. We we for some of y'all that may be upset about it, but we grabbed a glass of wine, we played music, had a glass of wine uh a glass of wine, and we folded clothes and we just talked about it.

SPEAKER_05:

I bet almost all of my laundry is still not open or oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_02:

Um and so it's it's just one of those things, though. It's at at Thanksgiving, there's it's it's just a time just to slow down.

SPEAKER_05:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

Take a deep breath. I always say this take a deep breath, relax, and just say, what is something that I re we're thankful for. And just be just just love on each other. Be honest with each other about hey, this is this is what I'm thankful for.

SPEAKER_05:

You truly have to decide to be thankful.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05:

You do.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah. I I agree with you. You said earlier it's a mindset.

SPEAKER_05:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

Producer Michael picked up his magazine. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03:

So we talk about, you know, be thankful, be thankful, and and we hear this so much in our lives, especially if you're raised in America where we celebrate Thanksgiving. You hear this at least once a year, every year, or at least you're aware of it. Why? Why should we be thankful? What is it, what does it do for ourselves? What does it do for our spouse when we're thankful for them and we communicate these things? Like and I'm just trying to think maybe I don't know maybe I'm thinking of Christmas already, but I'm thinking of like you know Ba humbug like why? You know, everyone's out here just trying to be positive and all this stuff. Like why why should we be focusing on being thankful in our lives?

SPEAKER_02:

Can not be the guy that asks the question back to you for asking the question.

SPEAKER_03:

Yeah, absolutely.

SPEAKER_02:

Well what's the opposite of not being thankful? Like if I'm not thankful for you, what's the opposite of that?

SPEAKER_04:

I think unsuchel thank you. Thomas with such a straight face those big green eyes who said unthankful.

SPEAKER_03:

Unthankful No he's not wrong but I have I have had conversations with people where it's more of a realism. Such a like well unpack that what does it mean? Like okay I can I can learn to be content with what I have but at the same time realistically if I grow too content I'm never going to grow. I'm not going to do more I'm not going to be able to achieve more or in talking about a relationship with a spouse it could be a you know but this is how they treat me this is what they do and I you can get so easily focused on those things. And part of me like why why I'm even asking that question is things that I've learned from myself is when you have a heart of gratitude so many other things don't matter.

SPEAKER_05:

So much else doesn't suck.

SPEAKER_03:

Yes. Honestly I mean well it can be so easy to get focused on the things that suck.

SPEAKER_05:

Well the three of us talking right now have been through spans of time where it was probably hard to find something that was thankful. Oh very much so um but when that book that darn book I keep going back to when I read that book 1,000 gifts it made me have to look at stuff differently and I'm like yes the rug was swept out from under me. No I did not ask for this however I woke up this morning I'm awake and I get to try again and for for my own self I had two little kids that are absolutely beautiful and there there there was there was beauty and there were blessings that when I started to try to train myself to see it that way it just got easier to to just I mean everything was a gift at that point. It truly was a gift.

SPEAKER_02:

Well because the other side of that is if you don't it becomes a black hole.

SPEAKER_05:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

And it just sucks you and it's just like you get caught up in your own self and your own thoughts kind of like Jess did this morning.

SPEAKER_05:

I sure did.

SPEAKER_02:

And you just start circling and spiral and everything's horrible everything's bad. And I'm like hey tonight we get to have dinner with our friends and our family and we get to sit around our table and tonight we're going to record a podcast that somebody around the world's going to listen to and maybe it it's we get that opportunity. Like we get to do that. Yeah. So it's like we can like the other side of not being thankful is like the other side is it's just a spiral of just negative.

SPEAKER_05:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

And so I think there's a difference though in saying oh I'm content um but I think being content is being a form of being thankful.

SPEAKER_05:

No very long you're happy with what you have.

SPEAKER_02:

You know what's interesting though when we don't talk about the Bible a whole lot on our podcast but we if you've if you've ever watched any sports you always see this um the whole uh John 316 I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.

SPEAKER_03:

If you read the scriptures before that 413 Philippians 413 I'm pretty sure you said John 316.

SPEAKER_02:

Did I see John 316? I'm sorry. I apologize it's a late night no you're good you're good apparently this is why we don't talk about the Bible a lot. Stop me anyway if you read the scriptures before that he he talks about he's like I know what it's like to be hungry. I know what it's like to be well fed I know what it's like to have plenty and I know what it's like to have nothing. And then he says I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength. So the idea is that we just hear that last part of I can do all things who gives but it's like no no no I know what it's like to have nothing. I know what it's like to have a lot like that's the idea of content. Yeah I've learned to be content in all things uh whether I have a lot or I don't have any and that dude I'm telling you if you're saying oh I've got that hammer call me. Because I'd love to talk to you because that's a that's a battle it doesn't matter where you're at in life that it that that's a moving target.

SPEAKER_03:

Well and I think it even comes back in very much along the lines of what you're saying if you cannot be content in the small things you will never be content when you have everything.

SPEAKER_05:

No.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah whether it's material items money any of those things whether it's the the the perfect job whatever it is like that's just an empty hole. Like you can continue to put stuff in that and it's always going to be there. So man I hope this is I mean I know when we say it's a tool of gratitude I don't know what to unpack other than I don't know try it. Find something. Yeah as a I guess my unpack is hey let's give it a whirl let's get on this bike and ride it and see what happens.

SPEAKER_05:

Try making a short list maybe five things for the next 10 days or whatever.

SPEAKER_03:

I mean that's a very easy place to start if you cannot find something because I'll say this I've been there where I could not find something keep reminding yourself to look for it because it will show up.

SPEAKER_02:

It will this is where I think having people in your life this is where I think community is huge. Having people in your life who love you and care about you who when you can't see the good can look into you and speak the good into you and say no Jess I see this in your life Michael I see this in your life we've been there yeah Miranda I see this like Thomas I see these things in your life this this is what you have be thankful for because sometimes we we don't we can't see the forest for the trees you know that whole this whole saying because we're so in the middle of it we can't see it but it's like yeah you and I have been like Michael bro like we've had some hard heart to heart conversations of like okay let's look at what we're thankful for what's with us right now. What do we have? And so moving forward I I agree I think that's a good maybe text each day text two things that you're grateful for from your some someone in your life in that relationship and just see what happens. They're not looking for anything.

SPEAKER_05:

I'll be I'll be honest two things may be a a lot for me some days.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah it's a lot because well it causes you to slow down and stop and think though. Yeah you know to to to take some time out and be like what am I grateful for? What am I grateful for this person in my life? Um those are those are huge challenges because we're I mean honestly a lot of us are just we're just self-centered we we we care about ourselves regular old people. Yeah so as we roll into happy Thanksgiving you know it's like well I mean there's so much we could talk about when it comes to this uh but this is just one simple thing uh practice some gratitude I promise it'll bring you joy if you do yeah and if I'm telling you go on if you go on a social media I can't buy everybody a book because there's a lot of people out there listening but I'll say at least the first five maybe ten people I'll say five at least five I think is a good if you if you if five of you because I don't know how we put it I'm gonna go log in right now. So if the five of you would go to our social media send us a a message um and just say I'd love to have the book we'll send it to you uh and hopefully it makes a change because we're heading into a tough season for a lot of people this is a great time to just say I want to be grateful and uh find thankfulness in all the little things. So thank you guys for joining us uh tonight thank you for sharing as we continue to grow we've added another country seems like that's something that we do every week around here which is that's so cool.

SPEAKER_05:

It's never not amazing.

SPEAKER_02:

We are again we've talked about our 50th episode is coming up in February uh if you're somewhere in or around Georgia we're trying to do a we're gonna try to do an event a live event where I'm going to just literally dive a bunch of anxiety we're gonna invite a bunch of people in for a live event it's not gonna be easy for me in February for our 50th episode and so we're gonna have live we'll have question and answer time there. We'll do a live uh broadcast uh we're gonna push some stuff out so it should be fun we don't know where it's gonna be we don't there's a lot of things we don't know uh there's a lot of unknowns but we're just having fun and we're still rolling and I mean it's not long away that's correct so but thank you guys so much for listening it really really I can't tell you enough how much we appreciate uh you guys listening to us and following us and sharing our stuff and so thank you continue to do so and if you if we can help in any way reach out to us so happy thanksgiving happy thanksgiving go doubts go doubt eat some turkey

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Greg & Jess

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